


You're Gonna Sing the Words Wrong

by Karkatsrolledupsleeves



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Angst, Coming Out, M/M, Questioning, also im not sure how long this will get but im really excited to write this, as this goes along expect some sadness and confusion, even though i headcanon dave as pan, it only gets worse from here people, my little gay babies, possible vriska later on, the title is from riptide, this is based on the recent upd8s
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-31
Updated: 2015-05-30
Packaged: 2018-04-02 02:49:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,929
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4042903
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Karkatsrolledupsleeves/pseuds/Karkatsrolledupsleeves
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Both Dave and Karkat wanted normal lives<br/>But nothing's normal when one boy is a troll, the other thinks he's gay and they both live on a rock flying at thousands of miles per hour in the middle of space with nothing to do but think about each other</p>
            </blockquote>





	You're Gonna Sing the Words Wrong

Dave was stuck.  
Not literally of course, he had full reign of the meteor as far as he knew and could go just about wherever his little heart desired.  
It was more of a mental blockage, a moment of grogginess where nothing stood still in his mind long enough to be comprehended and Dave just had to sit and wait for everything to make sense of itself.  
It started the week before, when Karkat had suggested a Dan Cook movie. Dave agreed to watch, hell, wasn't like he was doing anything else. And mayor needed a night away from the teenage boy. God knows what that chess piece does on his own terms.  
Plus Karkat had been grumpy all week and it was the first time he had opened up to Dave in a while.  
So, Dave sat down in one of the main rooms and turned on the tv. Karkat, being the nerd he was and still is, had already had the cd in and the movie at the title screen.  
“So whats it about? I'm not watching alien porn am I?”  
“Actually I'm not sure what the movies about. I saved it so we could watch it together.” Karkat shrugged and pressed play. There was a definite lack of sarcasm and hostility in Karkat’s response but the day Dave complained about that was the day Vriska would kill him for disturbing the ‘peace’.  
And now that Dave thought about it, this wasn't the only time karkat’s speech lacked the added spice of curses. Throughout the week the mutant-blooded teen had been avoiding Dave. Every time Dave would come into a room, Karkat would suddenly have something to do. If Dave was invited then Karkat started to get a fever. You know, the ones that you get when you’re around seven completely healthy people. And when germs don't exist in space.  
It was starting to worry the strider. What if Karkat wasn't his friend anymore? Was it something he said? Was Kanaya spilling juicy shit about Dave to Karkat behind his back?  
Was he not enough for his bro?  
“You saved a movie for me? I'm so touched. Honestly I feel we should celebrate this kind act pulled from the frozen ice block of my bros heart and pull out the corpses. This calls for a badass party and—“  
“Can we not do this now? I happened to have an extra movie to put aside and I'm sorry I took time out of my busy schedule to be nice.” Karkat sneered and sat down next to the Strider, resting his head on the blonds shoulder. Dave shuffled uncomfortably.  
“Alright, geez, I'll watch your stupid movie.”  
The next half hour was silent and Dave, who couldn't follow the story, started to feel bad. It wasn't like he MEANT to piss off Karkat. He just said what he thought Karkat would shake his head and smile at. What he would shrug off and resume ‘taking time out of his busy schedule’ to hang with his best friend and closest companion on this death trap of a rock.  
It was just…how their relationship worked.  
Dave would say something vaguely insulting or make a joke, and Karkat would either agree and laugh or get pissed. It was up to the troll to decide and today maybe Karkat was on more of an edge today than the previous weekdays.  
There was always the chance that Dave was feeling supportive one day, too, but that was rare and Karkat always assumed he was being sarcastic. It was a fucked up relationship for two fucked up people.  
Dave continued to squirm but Karkat was unaware, too invested in the movie was what Dave guessed.  
It turned out Karkat had fallen asleep. In the time Dave had taken to think about Karkat and his interactions, the troll boy had slipped from the coolkid’s shoulder to his lap, curling up to keep warm. Dave froze.  
In that position Karkat looked…sweet. His eyelids were softly shut instead of scrunched like when Karkat wanted to avoid a conversation or get frustrated. His hair, long since brushed, was splayed across his face and Dave was hit with the need to touch it, to touch Karkat. To keep him warm the way his short gray arms and stubby grey legs couldn't.  
Dave, with the limited mobility he had, slipped his arm out from under Karkat and reached for the pile of black fluff. With tired eyes straining to stay open, Dave gently passed his hand over his bros head, carefully as to keep Karkat asleep.  
It was then that Dave’s sight traveled a bit lower to Karkat’s lips. They were parted, letting a glimmer of fang show through. They looked soft enough to kiss and what did he just think.  
Kiss?  
No no no, there would be no homo kissing going on between Dave and Karkat. Dave wasn't even gay, let alone interested in Karkat! He had always thought they maintained a solid pale…thing or were maybe just really good friends. There was no way Dave wanted to jeopardize that.  
But the thought lingered in his head. What if he did kiss Karkat?  
Sure, the teeth would be an issue but you don't start with a French kiss, right? It had to be slow and sure, lips pressing against each other for a moment before maybe just a bit of teeth showed through but even then it wouldn't get that far.  
And Dave was sure arms didn't have to be involved, solving the whole sharp nailed troll problem.  
But the Strider boy was just thinking of scenarios with no relation to the real world and absolutely no connection with how he was feeling.  
Kissing wouldn't happen and there would be no slightly open mouths and possible lip sucking and oh god this was getting too sexual too fast.  
Dave bit his lip. He needed professional advice from a professional person who was a professional at making out with someone of the same sex.  
And he hoped she wasn't getting laid long enough to talk.

 

“Hey Rose, are you awake?” Dave peeked through the doorway. His head was a shadow in the beam of light shining into Rose’s eyes. The blond girl squinted to see her brother.  
“Now I am. What's the problem?” Rose reached for the lamp next to her and patted the bed she was previously sleeping in. Dave reluctantly made his way into the room.  
He immediately regretted his decision.  
“It's about Karkat.”  
“Oh yes, I've been hearing from Kanaya that he's been quite the dick.” Rose smiled.  
“Thanks captain obvious but I'm talking about…reactions to his actions.” Dave glanced around the room. It was basic metal square with a desk pushed in the corner and a rug hanging from the wall instead of on the floor. Empty bottles were scattered along the tile and a violin sat propped behind the door. The bed sat in the middle. It was all Dave could look at to keep from blushing.  
Even back in the hallway after an hour of watching Karkat sleep Dave was fighting himself. Wasn't it a bit late to be deciding a sexuality? After all, everyone he knew that was gay found out when they were middle school.  
Not that Dave was comparing himself to a gay person.  
But Karkat’s face couldn't leave Dave’s mind. Clips of karkat playing with the mayor and smiling played back like a video reel behind the cool kid’s eyes. Pictures of Karkat asleep and lying curled up on the couch flashed by.  
“Dave?” Rose lightly tapped Dave’s shoulder. He blinked and was brought back to Rose’s room.  
“Rose, if I tell you something, can you swear to keep quiet? Like, I'm not even joking if you tell anyone I'm going to have to stab you and I'm pretty sure you’re crucial to this team.”  
Rose nodded, “Of course…”  
“I think I might be gay for karkat? Or just gay in general. Or queer or bi or whatever sexualities there are I don't even know I just found out an hour ago okay.” Dave fumbled over words, tripping and flopping straight on his face. “And I feel like I might be gay because I looked as his lips and I wanted to kiss them and I’ve never wanted to kiss a guy before but I kept thinking about his mouth on my mouth and what it would be like for his hands to be in mine.”  
The teen started to hyperventilate, “He just looked so pretty in the TV light and not a girl pretty but a guy pretty and I'm not even sure if that's a thing but FUCK I want it to be and I think Karkat may be the prime example of that. Textbook definition.”  
“Dave—“  
“And I want to hold him and cuddle with him like I'm supposed to do with girls and Rose what if I really am gay?” Dave looked desperately at his sister. “What do I do?”  
“I don't...I don't think there is a thing you can do. And I can't see just why you feel like you'd need to do something.”  
“I'm gonna guess I'll need to tell people!” Dave yelled a bit too loud. Someone stirred in another room. “I mean, what if no one takes me seriously? Egbert and I have both had our share of shitty gay jokes and what if he doesn't think I'm cool anymore? What if he just makes me into a punchline?”  
“He's dead, Dave. He exploded.” Rose swallowed. This was the first time Dave had let his façade slip and she wasn't sure what to do. It was unnerving to say the least.  
“I know. I…know.” The teen relaxed. It was hard to concentrate on anything so Dave, tired, nauseous Dave, just closed his eyes.  
With no other way of comfort, Rose slid over, letting Dave fill the space next to her. She watched as his breathing slowed and the boy slipped into a troubled sleep. His fists were clenched and legs tucked into his chest. She could only wonder if he was dreaming of the troll boy asleep in the other room.  
Her psychological knowledge should have prepared her for this. For Dave’s breakdown. After all, many gay people have internalized homophobia and toxic masculinity rooted deep into themselves before they even start dating. However, as far as Rose knew, those people had died with the meteors along with the dangerous society that taught Dave these things. These beliefs that gay people were…punchlines. Thrown aside as the sassy “feminine” men and butch “masculine” women and left for people to hate or be confused by. A man who likes other men? Only girls like guys! So those men must be girly!  
It was a thought Rose had hoped long since disappeared.  
But here it was, tucked into Dave’s brain and mind. It was a vase destined to break and it seemed Karkat had knocked it over.  
Rose, as she laid down and shut the light, wondered if it was Bro’s fault. That Dave expected to get all the ladies and be strong and masculine. After all, the man was a walking porn site with biceps large enough to crush his baby brother’s head.  
As much as Rose would have liked to dive into the topic, it seemed that sleep was calling her name and with only a year left before the game would start to close, there was a bigger problem to solve.  
Was Karkat feeling the same way?


End file.
